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Emotionally Adrift Again

Posted by E. D. on May 28, 2016 at 12:05 AM

I seem to be facing the same crisis of identity that I've struggled with since my adolescence. The familiar feeling that I just don't belong where I am gnaws at me yet again, and I'm so ready to set my roots down and just BE! Perhaps it's better to be than belong... Perhaps the notion of having a life that fulfills is an errant one... Perhaps, but I'm not convinced that this gnawing, aching, pulling feeling is meant to be 'normal' for me or anyone. I've tried to determine where it is that I feel pulled to, but to no avail. The summation of the above-mentioned sensations is one of restlesness and frustration. I talk with the people around me, noticing the struggles that they deal with as well, and get the impression that they are doing exactly what they are supposed to be doing. Where is that kind of experience for me? Is it a job, a hobby, a volunteer opportunity, or is it simply a matter of perspective and I should fit in wherever I am? If this whole thing could be solved with the latter idea, how is that achieved and why have I been unable to attain such a perspective? (I've been actively trying to do this very thing for over a year now.) Right now, I'm praying about it all, seeking guidance. At present such help is not forthcoming, and I wonder how old I will be by the time I receive an answer...

Categories: Journal

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